Relationships

First off my son you are going to have 1000′s of relationship’s not just girl friends but friends, acquaintance, family, and working relationships when you get older.  People don’t realize this put every relationship in your life matter’s because people matter and having relationship in life make thing’s a lot easier on your life.  Now there are some cases where you’re not going to be able to choice the people who are in your life, like at school or work.  Here’s the deal  you have to learn to work with these people whether you like them or not it’s a part of life those people are the acquaintance in your life.  Your dad is a people person I can talk to anyone usually because I know a lot of them, this makes things on me a lot easier because it allows me to not only help myself but help others.  Now I know a wide variety of people from lawyers and policeman to crooks and criminals but the fact is everyone has a place in this world and you never know what it is your going to need.  Real quick off this subject don’t ever judge people that’s the worst thing you can ever do especially when your trying to build relationships with these people.  Hopefully you hear me say this a lot but “everyone has a place in this world” it’s very simple to understand without those criminals whats the need for police and so on.  Not to mention my boy you have no right to judge anyone you’re not perfect this goes back to my initial post titled Son so I will get back on topic you now how I am.  So keep a good relationship’s with these acquaintance you will find more often that not you will need people down the line.  Friends now to me son there isn’t much difference between friends and acquaintance’s except how much you allow them to be in your life because friends are the people you choose to hang around and when you are around them,  Being italian family is the most important thing to us so that being said son people don’t have to have your last name for you to consider them family and just because they have your last name doesn’t mean they are truly a part of your family.  One day I will sit you down and tell you about your Aunt that I no longer consider family actually I don’t consider her anything at all if I never talk to her again I will be ok with it.  Now don’t get me wrong I don’t hate her or even want anything bad to happen to her it’s just best I don’t have her in my life and that happens I’m sure that one day you will feel that way about someone and I will try to talk you out of it but you need to make that decision for yourself it is your life after all.  Your godfather though not in any legal way is my family  your uncle Billy is like my brother.  Those are just two examples that im giving you im sure you know they others who are I consider my real family. The people you surround yourself with are the one’s that are your family the one’s that truly care about you, the one’s that will love and support you in your hard times and be there to celebrate your special times.  I hope you find these people because your going to need them for the next part the girl friends. Oh my sweet handsome boy you will learn that heart-break is awful there is actually no pain like it, that’s where the family I just talked about is going to be needed.  To pick you up when your world comes crashing down now I can tell already you are not going to have no problem finding girlfriend’s im not sure if im going to like them all but one day there’s going to be one that your going to want and your going to think you’re in love and this girl is going to crush you.  Let me be honest I’m dreading this day but it needs to come because that’s life and having your heart-broken will teach you more about life than most things that I can say.  Now son as I’m sure your figuring out right now do to mine and your mom’s divorce people saying love makes people do crazy things I don’t believe that to be true, I think people thinking there losing love makes them do crazy things and if you have to do crazy things to keep people there probably not the right person for you cause what they are asking you to do wouldn’t seem crazy.  Let me tell you a little secret there all types of love and im happy to tell you that you my son have an endless supply.  Understanding that hopefully will make some of these things easier on you don’t be in a relationship that isn’t good for you because your afraid your going to end up alone or you’re not good enough.  If the person your with doesn’t expect you for who you are and is hurting you in any way get out of it you will find the person your suppose to be with your to good of a person not to.  Well my son hopefully some of this sinks in I love you lets enjoy this wonderful life.   

 

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Step parent

I’m in a very weird situation but so im kind of looking for feed back on this topic.  First the me give you my back ground and beliefs behind this topic.  As per and older post I’m a father and also i step father but not really if that makes sense.  My soon to be ex-wife had a daughter before we got married when her Daughter was a very young age.  So im the only father she has ever been around well this divorce is messy and there is some circumstance that I don’t really want to get in to but lets say we really aren’t on good terms.  Me and this ex-wife also have a kid together now, so where in a custody battle over our son and during this I tried to get some kind of rights for my daughter just to be told by the judge she isn’t your daughter.  You have no rights to her as much as that hurt I have come to accept it.  So now I have a new woman in my life im sure one day I will blog about her but for now I will stay on topic.  This woman is obviously someone I want around my child and even though she has seen the pain I have been in from losing my daughter she is still ready to commit to being a loving mother figure in his life because we do plan on having kids together.  Now obviously whether it be jealous or what not the ex hates this and talks about being replaced.  My thing is all I care about is my son having as many loving people around him as possible.  Now I can understand her being a little jealous of the fact that there is going to be another mother figure in his life but it should be about are son not her.  Good step parents that really treat your kids like their kids are amazing people.  To me anyway I mean I was one of those people I love that little girl as if she was my own and also thought of her as if she was.  After writing this I really don’t have a question at all as a parent you need to surround your kid with as many loving and caring people as you can cause this world is a harsh place and myself and my ex-wife should really apperciate any one thats willling to love your kids as there own.

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My son

I started this blog because I’m a very hard-working 30-year-old and one of my biggest concerns in my life is trying to pass down my beliefs and wisdom to my amazing son.  I’m not foolish to think that he is just going to do what I say and not make mistakes in life. But what I’m trying to do is leave him with something just incase our time is cut short. You see that’s already happened a little bit since I am in the process of getting divorced. At the same time, it has been awake up call for me because I can honestly say I took my amazing kid for granted. It’s awful to say but it’s the truth and there are so many topics to touch on each deserving it own individual post. But today I want to stress to my son is don’t be ashamed of your choice’s in life and don’t ever feel like you need to hide who you are and what you have done. People my tell you differently those people aren’t ones that truly care about you. If you do something that makes you happy and doesn’t hurt others than I say do it. You are the only one that has to live this life so live it the way you want.  One thing that goes with this is don’t ever feel like you need to have an defend or make excuse’s for your action.  You are going to do things that aren’t always right or that you may later regret but if you do those things with good intention or because you felt like they were necessary then there really is no excuse.  On that point if you are about to do something and already have an excuse then it’s not something you probably shouldn’t be doing.   I’m sure you my have question about many things and I will do everything I can to have these conversation with you face to face and of course im hoping that when you need guidance you come to me just like I did I went to my father and grandfather.  You see son we are in a long line of great men and im sure you are one day going to question if you’re a great man it’s hard to know because those great men before you set the bar really high, hopefully you feel the same way about me.  Son if your reading this I love you and I hope that we are reading this togther right now.

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